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Home > The Importance of Fathers in the Healthy Development of Children > Appendix E - Tips for Dads > Ten Ways to Be a Better Dad
The Importance of Fathers in the Healthy Development of Children
User Manual Series (2006)
Author(s): Office on Child Abuse and Neglect
Rosenberg, Wilcox |
| Year Published: 2006 |
Appendix E - Tips for Dads
Ten Ways to Be a Better Dad
1. Respect Your Children's Mother
One of the best things a father can do for his children is to respect their mother. If you are married, keep
your marriage strong and vital. If you are not married, it is still important to respect and support the mother
of your children. A father and mother who respect each other and let their children know it provide a secure
environment for them. When children see their parents respecting each other, they are more likely to feel that
they are also accepted and respected.
2. Spend Time with Your Children
How a father spends his time tells his children what is important to him. If you always seem too busy for your
children, they will feel neglected no matter what you say. Treasuring children often means sacrificing other
things, but it is essential to spend time with your children. Kids grow up so quickly. Missed opportunities are
lost forever.
3. Earn the Right to Be Heard
All too often, the only time a father speaks to his children is when they have done something wrong. That is
why so many children cringe when their mother says, "Your father wants to talk with you." Begin talking with
your kids when they are very young so that difficult subjects will be easier to handle as they get older. Take
time and listen to their ideas and problems.
4. Discipline with Love
All children need guidance and discipline, not as punishment, but to set reasonable limits. Remind your
children of the consequences of their actions and provide meaningful rewards for desirable behavior. Fathers
who discipline in a calm and fair manner show love for their children.
5. Be a Role Model
Fathers are role models to their kids whether they realize it or not. A girl who spends time with a loving father
grows up knowing she deserves to be treated with respect by boys, and what to look for in a husband. Fathers
can teach sons what is important in life by demonstrating honesty, humility, and responsibility.
6. Be a Teacher
Too many fathers think teaching is something others do, but a father who teaches his children about right and
wrong, and encourages them to do their best, will see his children make good choices. Involved fathers use
everyday examples to help their children learn the basic lessons of life.
7. Eat Together as a Family
Sharing a meal together (breakfast, lunch, or dinner) can be an important part of healthy family life. In
addition to providing some structure in a busy day, it gives kids the chance to talk about what they are doing
and want to do. It is also a good time for fathers to listen and give advice. Most importantly, it is a time for
families to be together each day.
8. Read to Your Children
In a world where television often dominates the lives of children, it is important that fathers make the effort
to read to their children. Children learn best by doing and reading, as well as seeing and hearing. Begin
reading to your children when they are very young. When they are older, encourage them to read on their
own. Instilling your children with a love for reading is one of the best ways to ensure they will have a lifetime
of personal and career growth.
9. Show Affection
Children need the security that comes from knowing they are wanted, accepted, and loved by their family.
Parents, especially fathers, need to feel both comfortable and willing to hug their children. Showing affection
everyday is the best way to let your children know that you love them.
10. Realize That a Father's Job Is Never Done
Even after children are grown and ready to leave home, they still look to their fathers for wisdom and advice.
Whether it is continued schooling, a new job, or a wedding, fathers continue to play an essential part in the
lives of their children as they grow and, perhaps, marry and build their own families.
National Fatherhood Initiative. (n.d.). 10 ways to be a better dad [On-line]. Available: http://www.fatherhood.org/10ways.asp.
This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway.
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