Chapter 2: Working With Families: The Five Protective Factors


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Home > Strengthening Families and Communities: 2009 Resource Guide > Chapter 2: Working With Families: The Five Protective Factors - Parental Resilience

Strengthening Families and Communities: 2009 Resource Guide

Author(s): Child Welfare Information Gateway, Children's Bureau, FRIENDS National Resource Center For Community-Based Child Abuse Prevention

Year Published: 2009

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Chapter 2: Working With Families: The Five Protective Factors
Parental Resilience

Parents who can cope with the stresses of everyday life, as well as an occasional crisis, have resilience; they have the flexibility and inner strength necessary to bounce back when things are not going well. Parents with resilience are generally able to cope on their own, but they also know how to seek help in times of trouble. Their ability to deal with life's ups and downs serves as a model of coping behavior for their children.

Multiple life stressors, such as a family history of abuse or neglect, physical and mental health problems, marital conflict, substance abuse, and domestic or community violence—and financial stressors such as unemployment, financial insecurity, and homelessness—may reduce a parent's capacity to cope effectively with the typical day-to-day stresses of raising children.

All parents have inner strengths or resources that can serve as a foundation for building their resilience. These may include faith, flexibility, humor, communication skills, problem-solving skills, mutually supportive caring relationships, or the ability to identify and access outside resources and services when needed. All of these strengthen the capacity to parent effectively, and they can be nurtured and developed through concrete skill-building activities or through supportive interactions with others. In addition, community services that help families in crisis include mental health programs, substance abuse treatment, family and marital counseling, and special education and treatment programs for children with special needs.

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Exploring Strengths and Needs

The term "resilience" will not resonate with all parents. Explore alternate ways of talking about these skills, such as the affirmation, "I will continue to have courage during stressful times or after a crisis."

By partnering with parents, you can help them pinpoint the factors contributing to their stress, as well as their successful coping strategies and their personal, family, and community resources.

In order to explore . . .	Ask the parent . . .
What the parent identifies as his or her coping strengths and resilience The parent's strengths in parenting	What helps you cope with everyday life? Where do you draw your strength? How does this help you in parenting? What are your dreams for yourself and your family?
What the parent identifies as everyday stressors Problem-solving skills Stressors precipitated by crises	What kinds of frustrations or worries do you deal with during the day? How do you solve these everyday problems as they come up? Has something happened recently that has made life more difficult?
Impact of stress on parenting Impact of parenting on stress	How are you able to meet your children's needs when you are dealing with stress? How are your children reacting to (crisis)?
How the parent communicates with his or her spouse or partner Whether there is marital stress or conflict	How do you and your spouse communicate about concerns? How does your spouse or partner support you in times of stress? How do you and your spouse or partner work together in parenting? What happens when you and your spouse or partner disagree?
Needs that might be identified by a different family member (not all family members may identify the same needs) Actions that a parent may need to take when additional needs are identified	Are other family members experiencing stress or concern? Has anyone in your family expressed concern about drug or alcohol abuse? What steps have you taken to address those concerns?
Short-term supports (respite care, help with a new baby, help during an illness) Long-term strategies (job training, marital counseling)	When you are under stress, what is most helpful to you? Are there places in the community where you can find help?
The parent's ability to set and work toward personal goals	What are your goals for your family or children in the next week (or month)? What are your long-term goals for yourself? For your children and family? What steps might you take toward those goals in the next week? (or month)?

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Sharing Strategies and Resources to Promote Parental Resilience

When parents identify and communicate what worries them most, there is an opportunity to offer some coping strategies and resources to begin to deal with the stress. Parents are not always aware how their ability to cope with stress may impact their capacity to parent and their children's development. You can help parents recognize that they can model coping behaviors for their children, since children observe and imitate parents in many ways. Empowering parents to seek help and take steps to combat stress is part of building both resilience and hope.

Some needs are obvious to all family members and to providers. Other needs, such as marital counseling or substance abuse treatment, may become apparent when one family member expresses concern about another. Partnering with the family includes helping all family members translate their concerns into specific needs that can be discussed and resolved. Many community resources and services are available to help families cope. Faith communities, community colleges, self-help groups, and social service agencies can help parents and caregivers develop problem-solving and communication skills that strengthen their ability to deal effectively with crisis, so they can continue to provide for their children.

Resources for building resilience may include information about:

Stress—causes and results

How stress happens, including the "little things" that add up
Ways to recognize stress and its triggers
How stress affects health and coping
How stress affects parenting, marriage, and family life

Finding ways to build resilience

Stress management techniques, such as regular exercise, relaxation to music, and meditation or prayer
How to prevent stress by planning ahead, anticipating difficulties, and having resources in place
How to anticipate and minimize everyday stress
How to handle major stressors, including accessing resources and supports from family, friends, faith communities, and other community resources
Family management techniques, such as effective ways of communicating needs and concerns
Programs that offer family-to-family help or mentoring for personalized, intensive, sustained services or support, especially in times of crisis
Community supports such as mental health and counseling services, substance abuse treatment, domestic violence programs, and self-help support groups
Concrete skill building in areas such as problem solving, goal setting, communication, and self-care

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To view or order materials available from the 2009 Resource Guide, please visit our website at: http://www.childwelfare.gov/preventing/res_guide_2009/

This material may be freely reproduced and distributed. However, when doing so, please credit Child Welfare Information Gateway.

Updated on October 9, 2009

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
Administration for Children and Families
Administration on Children, Youth and Families
Children's Bureau

Child Welfare Information Gateway
Children's Bureau/ACYF
1250 Maryland Avenue, SW
Eighth Floor
Washington, DC 20024
703.385.7565 or 800.394.3366
Email: info@childwelfare.gov